Friday, May 24, 2013

That Family

 We are officially THAT family.
 
The one whose kids climb on crap they aren't supposed to climb on in the 10 seconds the parents look away because, well, said parents don't have a cooler and said parents thought maybe it would be nice to have one.
 
Bad idea.
 
You see, these children of mine, who had seconds earlier been hanging on to the side of the cart - one on each side - saw their opportunity to have a little party. So when I looked back to check on my children, this is what I saw:
 
 
That is called a Costco Cooler Party.
 
That is what happens when you look away for TEN flippin' SECONDS!!!
 
How does this happen, people? I want to know. I want to know if we are the only ones this happens to, because I am pretty sure I don't see other people's children climbing cooler displays.
 
Oh, and for the sake of 100% transparency, Nico then took off. Yes, Nico took off and I took off after him, with Noah tucked under one arm like a football and the entire Costco patronage staring at me, maybe even laughing at me a little bit.
 
When I reached the little turd, he crumpled into a giggling heap on the floor. My sister once brilliantly stated that all good protesters should do what toddlers do and just go limp when police try to arrest them. I now understand why. Because my child went limp. And when you have the other child in a football hold, it makes it really hard to pick up another child who is laying there like a 30-pound sack of flour.
 
So I grabbed him by the arm and dragged him back to the cart (Note to Self - Costco has really slippery floors! He just slid right along!). Yes, that's right. One child was a football and the other child was a prisoner of war.
 
 And my husband, the one who was my hero just a few days ago, is now dead to me because he stood in line laughing while I was THAT mom with THAT family.
 
 Thank God they are quite possible the cutest beings I have ever seen.
 
There is always THAT.
 

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